A beautiful butterfly

Hi my sweet girl,

When I was about four months pregnant, I went out to Colorado to visit your Grandma Jenny. We went shopping at the Carter's store picking out various clothes in gender-neutral colors because your Dadada and I didn't know whether you were a boy or a girl. We didn't want to know, and during the ultrasound at 11 weeks, you didn't want us to know either because you crossed your legs so the nurse couldn't see.

So your Grandma Jenny and I had a pile of clothes, some even in pale blue, when I saw this pink onesie with a butterfly and the text "A Beautiful Butterfly" in a 9 month size. I had to have it.

See, I knew, deep down in my gut and instinct knew you were a girl. I had dreams of you being a girl, when I imagined you talking to me from the womb, you had a girl's voice, I just knew.

We had one outfit that was dark blue and when we got to the register I couldn't buy it. I couldn't picture you in a boy outfit.

Up until the last month of my pregnancy, I knew you were a girl, but then doubt penetrated my intuition. As we grew nearer and then passed my due date of 3/27, I had to have another ultrasound and this time your Dadada and I said the nurse could tell us your gender.

"I can tell, are you sure you want to know?" the nurse asked us.

"Yes."

"I can see...labia."

You were a girl, I knew it.